Dear Diary,
    I have had an interesting day and have met some very peculiar people! I am not used to the rolling of the sea and I'm feeling very sick today. The extreme stench of the puke I have to clean up is not helping me feel any better.
    I had an unusual encounter with Agent X. He seems to be a very paranoid and unstable man. While Agent X was walking around the deck today, on the lookout, all of a sudden he came running by and slipped on the mess I was in the midst of cleaning up before I had the chance to warn him. Before I knew it his feet had slipped out from underneath him and he was sliding across the floor on his back squealing like a dying pig.
    When he stood up, I took one look at him covered and dripping with bile and ran to the edge of the boat, throwing up uncontrollably. I don't think I'm ever going to go on a boat again in my life! As I was throwing up, Agent X came up behind me ranting and raving, his face as red as a pimple about to burst. Oh, no! Just as Agent X was about to clobber me I rolled out of the way and he hit his head on the side of the ship. I started running across the deck and saw Janis chasing after a pig. I quickly ran through the ship all the way to the crew's quarters and jumped into my hammock where I am writing to you now.

Sincerely,         
Sipho